My head hurts like I banged it against the sharpest edge I could ever find.
It has come down to it and it is the last week of "finals" before I go home for "break".
I say it like that because it never is a break for me and I am still stressing over the smallest details when I am at home.
My piano final went great. I got a perfect!
My theater final went well. I got four wrong.
My law final went amazing! I knew all the material. (I say this 'cause I only studied the night before)
My french final went horribly wrong. I think I failed.
But it is not my problem because my brain can only hold so much information.
Don't try and give me a test about subjontif, conditionnel, imparfait, and futur ever combined! That is still hurting my head!
Right now I am sitting down typing this while I wait for my rice to finish cooking.
As I realize how small my roommate is when she walked out of her room, I ponder about my body.
Have I gotten smaller? Are my thighs still nice and plump? How is my face looking?
No one has really seen photos of me back home and my friend hasn't seen a pic or a live vid of my face for 2 weeks... I love this mystery!
I am not saying this to encourage people to not eat or to do something bad.. All I am saying, is that I have not taken good care of myself, as much as I should, but I still look in the mirror and have insecurities.
Even if I had less fat on my body and I had nice muscles, I would still probably still feel bad.
Anyway, if I go back home and I fit into my size 12 shorts, I'll be happy and wear them all the time.
And if I don't, then I don't know. I will still try to work on myself and workout more, but like... school is basically taking up most of my life.
I don't have time to eat even...
Oh well, hopefully I will be more active and eat more food in general when I am back home.
Peace.
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