Nevermind

I get bored easily.
I need to do things that are stimulating for my brain.
I don't like doing homework unless I want to do it.
I don't have motivation for work.
I did pretty well this past week of working out, but sadly some snow came down.

I need company.
Small interaction.
If I don't, then I feel useless.

I'm like an introverted extrovert.
I like company, but I like to observe and still have some space.
I like taking naps and lounging in my room, but I need some flow of interaction here and there or else I feel... sad.

It's sad knowing you have depression and you can't really stop those moments where you feel like you want to do nothing. But also other times where you want to be around people, but have no one.
If I was back home, right now, I would go on a train and get off in LA, Glendale, or Hollywood.
I would walk around, until I had enough time wandering with other strangers and head home.

But I'm not.
I'm stuck.
I hate it.

I want to go home at times, and others.... well, I feel like I would miss a lot.
But then I remember moments like this and I definitely would rather be home than be stranded with no way out.

Maybe I'll talk quietly to our fish in the apartment.



I feel so fucking stupid. And alone... I just wish people would visit me.




peace